Admission Free--For the Day

Hello. Welcome to Google Up-to-the-Minute News. This is your Friendly, Neighborhood Interloper, reporting to you from Shades of the Olde West. This delightful new theme park has been created solely to amuse, inform and entertain—and allow access to my door.

Almost overnight—well, over 2 nights—the whole aspect of my house has changed. Let’s see the pictures:

BEFORE: There was a gaggle of railroad ties leading from the community sidewalk, through the gate, and continuing past my deck. Said deck was a tiny affair, perched in front of a door that opened outward, defying all safety and sanity dicta. If a guest were to knock, without prior knowledge of the arrangement, and without really examining the entrance, I could open the door and sweep them off the deck in one motion. The RR ties had been here long enough for the winter heaves, the summer cloudbursts, and the aging elm tree’s roots to severely undermine their integrity and horizontal arrangement. In other words, you could break a leg or a neck without even trying.

Giving access to the deck were three steps, shallow risers. You walked in on the ties, stepped sideways to the steps, and took your chances on where you stood allowing you room to dodge the opening door, without stumbling backward onto the steps and a dangerous fall. It was also possible to fall from the deck to the ground, bypassing the steps. They were only half as wide as the side of the deck--no rail to impede your drop. If you fell that route, you had the side of the house to bang your head on.

GETTING THERE: This picture was improved slightly by the removal of the RR ties. That allowed you to walk in on dirt, or boat in if it was raining. But the danger at the head of the stairs remained.

AFTER: A boardwalk enters through the gate from the sidewalk. Just like in the old days---false-front-stores, approached on wooden sidewalks, meant to keep long skirts out of the muck of the streets. After a platform area just inside the gate, the boardwalk makes a sharp left turn to join up with an extension of the bottom step. Those steps are further out than they were, due to an extension of the deck, as well. Now you can walk all the way to the door on dry boards, knock, and retreat to the newer portion of the deck—removing all the challenge and fun from the adventure of visiting my house. It also ended my game of “see how far can you launch the guest”. Oh well, I’ll live without it---and more guests will too. And the Old West has returned to this corner of the town. (Currently untested by long skirts.)